Mark Cuban on the Lakers: ‘Personally, I just hope they suck forever’

Mark Cuban, the bombastic billionaire owner of the Dallas Mavericks, was on a Los Angeles radio show where he told host Fred Roggin that, “You know me, Fred. Personally, I just hope they suck forever.”

Cuban was talking about the Los Angeles Lakers and their 1-9 start, the worst start in franchise history.

It’s hard for me to put into words how much I dislike Mark Cuban. The guy is a neverending sound bite of stupidity. He craves attention so much that he just can’t help from saying stupid things, for example, going on a Los Angeles radio show and telling listeners that you hope their favorite sports team sucks forever. Why is he on a Los Angeles radio show? Why is he talking about a team other than his Dallas Mavericks?

What other owner in professional sports would do that? Cuban is always putting himself out there, trying to get attention. I couldn’t even tell you how owns the two other NBA teams in Texas, the Houston Rockets or the San Antonio Spurs. I’m sure I could easily find out who owns those two teams on Wikipedia or over at Ask Jeeves, but that’s not the point. The point is that most teams in the NBA have owners who don’t try to steal the spotlight from the teams they own. Why can’t Cuban be more like the owners of those two franchises?

Because he’s an attention whore, that’s why.

Hello Kitty's parents sound like a couple of jerks

It turns out that Hello Kitty, the iconic character created 40 years ago by the Japanese company Sanrio, is not a cat, but a human girl. She’s also not Japanese, she’s British. Who know? Christine R. Yano, anthropologist from the University of Hawaii and author of Pink Globalization: Hello Kitty’s Trek across the Pacific, that’s who.

According to Yano, Hello Kitty is a British girl who just happens to look like a lot like a cat. Her real name is Kitty White. Her parents sound like a couple of jerks. They have a daughter with birth defects so severe, that it makes her seem feline, and they respond by naming her Kitty. They look at their infant daughter and see a newborn baby with ears on top of her head and whiskers jutting from her face, and they give her a name that is a synonym for a cat.

What a couple of passive-aggressive assholes.

I don’t know who Hello Kitty’s parents are, but I hate them with the intensity of a thousand suns. They obviously made a lot of money off their daughter’s malformations. They should have taken some of that money and used it to take Hello Kitty to medical specialists. British children should have bad teeth, not look like the family pet.

Ray Rice implies his wife is a failure

Baltimore Ravens star running back Ray Rice appeared at a bizarre press conference yesterday with wife Janay Palmer. It was the first time either Rice or Palmer spoke publicly about a recent domestic dispute at a hotel-casino in Atlantic City, New Jersey that resulted with Rice knocking Palmer out. The entire incident was captured on really bad security video at the casino. A portion of the video showing Rice dragging an unconscious Palmer out of an elevator had been posted online by TMZ.

Rice was able to avoid a trial. He agreed to a diversionary program that once completed, will allow him to clear his record. It will be like it never happened.

One of the highlights of the press conference was when Rice began talking about failure.

I wouldn’t call Ray Rice a failure either. I would call him a man who hit a woman. That’s worse than being a failure. From Twitter: Rice knocked his then-fiancee down. She wasn’t able to get up, as the video shows. Rice had to drag her limp body out of the elevator. In Rice’s world, that means Janay Palmer, the mother of his child, is a failure. She was knocked down and didn’t get up. He must believe that, or he wouldn’t have said it. The Ravens must believe it too because they posted the quote on their official Twitter feed. Janay Palmer even apologized for getting knocked out. Sort of. Also from Twitter:

The role? How sad that a victim of domestic violence would take any of the blame for the violence. It’s ridiculous that this feeling of regret was repeated on the official Twitter feed of the Baltimore Ravens. They should know better, but I guess they don’t.

Speaking of knowing better, I wonder what Under Armor thinks about their logo being prominently displayed at a press conference for a man who would put their hands on a woman? The signage behind Rice and his victim looks electronic, so you’d think that it would have been removed before the event.

Maybe it should have been.

Update: Looks like the Ravens have removed one of the Twitter tweets.

Donald Sterling threatens to sue the NBA

Remember when NBA commissioner Adam Silver banned Los Angeles Clippers owner Donald Sterling for life? Yeah, about that. Sterling has hired high-priced antitrust lawyer Maxwell Blecher and is vowing to fight the NBA, claiming that he has done nothing wrong.

In Sterling’s defense, I’m sure he believes that.

He’s been a terrible human being for decades. He’s done far worse things than telling his mistress/personal assistant that he didn’t want her to bring black people to basketball games. Donald Sterling is a slum lord who routinely discriminated against people by refusing to rent apartments to people because of the color of their skin. Housing discrimination is far worse than getting angry at your skeevy mistress because she posted a photo of herself on Instagram standing with Magic Johnson.

Donald Sterling is a billionaire, and he’s a lawyer. As Jesus once said, it’s easier to get a camel to go through the eye of a needle than it is to get a billionaire lawyer to do something they don’t want to do.

It seems that Donald Sterling doesn’t want to go away quietly.

Donald Sterling banned from NBA for being Donald Sterling

I’d prefer if the team was just kicked out of the league and the players be allowed to sign with other teams.

Donald Sterling, owner of the Los Angeles Clippers, found out the hard way that Adam Silver, the newly crowned commissioner of the NBA, is not someone to be trifled with. Silver announced yesterday that Sterling is banned from the NBA for life. Considering that he’s eighty years old, that may not be for very long. Also, Silver said he’s calling for the other 29 owners of NBA teams to hold a vote to force Sterling to sell the Clippers. Lastly, Silver also fined Sterling $2.5 million, the most that an owner can be fined by the NBA.

Adam Silver made it abundantly clear that, unlike he predecessor, he has no patience for Sterling’s racist shenanigans.

Good.

I’d prefer it if this racist old coot didn’t have to sell the Clippers. It bothers me that when he sells the team, he will pocket a windfall. He paid only $12.5 million for the Clippers back in 1981. When he sells it, he will rake in considerably more. He ran the team into the ground for decades, yet when he sells, he will be adding a substantial amount it his already massive fortune.

That just doesn’t seem right.

I’d prefer if the team was just kicked out of the league and the players be allowed to sign with other teams. I don’t know if that is possible under the NBA constitution, but it should be.

Donald Sterling doesn't care if his girlfriend has sex with someone who has HIV

Racist slumlord Donald Sterling, the owner of the Los Angeles Clippers, has been captured on an audio recording talking to V. Stiviano, his girlfriend, about a photo she posted on the Instagram showing her with NBA Hall of Fame player and Lakers great Magic Johnson. Sterling had a problem with the photo because Johnson is a man of color, and he didn’t like Stiviano broadcasting that she associates with black people, even though, ironically, she is of black and Hispanic heritage.


I have to wonder if Sterling and Stiviano were actually in a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship in the classical sense. In the audio, Sterling can be heard telling Stiviano that he doesn’t care if she has sex with Magic Johnson, he just doesn’t want her posting pictures of Johnson on the Instagram or bringing him to Clippers games. Considering that Johnson has HIV, the virus that causes AIDS, you’d think he wouldn’t want his girlfriend, someone you would assume he has a sexual relationship with, exposing herself to HIV.

Most men would have a problem with their girlfriend having sex with anyone, let alone someone who has HIV.

It’s pretty obvious that V. Stiviano recorded the conversation. It sounded like she knew they were being recorded. She’s currently being used by Rochelle Sterling, the wife of Donald Sterling, for sexually seducing Donald so that he would shower her with money and expensive gifts. I think Stiviano recorded this conversation and then her lawyers probably gave it to TMZ. If Stiviano recorded this conversation with Donald Sterling, I’m sure she also recorded others.

I can’t wait to hear them.

Update: Deadspin has acquired a longer version of the audio between Sterling and Stiviano.