Joel Osteen’s megachurch received a $4.4 million PPP loan

Smarmy TV and megachurch pastor Joel Osteen got a $4.4 million government Paycheck Protection Program (PPP) loan because of the coronavirus pandemic.

From NBC News:

Celebrity pastor Joel Osteen’s megachurch received a $4.4 million loan from the federal government’s Paycheck Protection Program, data released under FOIA shows.

The Lakewood Church, based in Houston, Texas, received the loan in July.

“Lakewood suspended its in-person services for more than seven months…impacting its ability to collect substantial donations during those services,” church spokesperson Andrea Davis told NBC News in an email.

The way PPP loans work is if you don’t fire any of your employees for a certain amount of time, you don’t have to pay the government back. It’s free money.

Osteen’s megachurch pays zero in taxes. It can still take advantage of a government program intended to help small businesses affected by the pandemic. Isn’t this a great country?

Here’s a photo of Joel Osteen’s primary mansion in case you were worried about him riding out any stay-at-home orders.

Joel Osteen's megachurch received a $4.4 million PPP loan - Bent Corner

Just kidding! Osteen didn’t have to worry about a stay-at-home order. He lives in Texas. They don’t believe in coronavirus lockdowns in Texas.

Joel Osteen is a very rich man

If you’re like me and don’t like Joel Osteen, I’ve got some good news. When he dies, he’ll be spending all of eternity in the only place worse than Texas, the pits of Hell. It says so right in the Bible. In Matthew 19:24, Jesus Christ said:

And again I say unto you, It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God.

Joel Osteen's megachurch received a $4.4 million PPP loan - Bent Corner
Does this look like it can go through the eye of a needle?

If you’re not going to the kingdom of God, you’re going to Hell. There is no third option. Take another look at that mansion and tell me Jesus Christ wasn’t specifically talking about Joel Osteen when he said that.