Tag: Jesus Christ

Dave Bautista threatens to quit ‘Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3’

Dave Bautista, former WWE wrestler, and current actor said he will not be in Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 if Disney doesn’t use James Gunn’s script, one way or another, he will not be in the movie. From Shortlist, a website best known for its comprehensive lists written by people standing 4-10 or less, published an interview with Bautista. From that interview:

“Nobody’s defending his tweets, but this was a smear campaign on a good man,” he said, speaking to ShortList’s Tom Ellen. “I spoke to Chris Pratt the day after it happened and he’s a bit religious so he wanted time to pray and figure it out, but I was more like: fuck this. This is bullshit. James is one of the kindest, most decent people I’ve met.”

Bautista said Gunn had already turned in the script for Guardians of the Galaxy: Volume 3. A replacement director for the film, due to shoot early next year, has not yet been announced.

“Where I’m at right now is that if [Marvel] don’t use that script, then I’m going to ask them to release me from my contract, cut me out or recast me.

“I’d be doing James a disservice if I didn’t.”

 

I wish I had a friend like Dave Bautista

Dave Bautista threatens to quit 'Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3' - Bent Corner
What a friend we have in Caucasian Jesus.

Growing up in the Lancaster First Assembly of God church, there was a song we often sang. It was called, “What a Friend We Have in Jesus.” I know Jesus Christ died for our sins and all, but I think I’d rather have Dave Bautista for a friend. What he’s threatening to do is so punk rock. It’s awesome.

I can remember listening to an interview with James Gunn talking about the initial casting of Guardians of the Galaxy. Gunn said something to the effect that he thought he was going to have to settle for someone to play the part of Drax the Destroyer. He figured he would never be able to find someone who had the physical presence needed for Drax, but also have the comedic timing his take on the character required.  Gunn then found Dave Bautista.

Much like how Disney will never be able to find another actor to play the part of Drax the Destroyer, Bautista will never find a part as special as Drax. He was born to play the part. This is one of the reasons I find his stand so admirable.

To be honest, when Disney fired Gunn for inappropriate Twitter tweets made seven years ago, I assumed they were getting out of the who Guardians of the Galaxy business. I was wrong.

I can’t imagine Disney not using Gunn’s script if they already have it. It’s not like they pulled his two earlier movies from their back catalog. Afterall, those two movies are a lot closer to the time Gunn made the offensive tweets than a third Guardians would be.

Happy Easter and/or April’s Fool’s Day

Today is Easter, the day Jesus Christ arose from his tomb after dying for everyone’s sins. Your sins, your mother’s sins, even Jimmy Buffett’s sins. We’re talking everyone’s sins. All someone has to do to have their sins forgiven is to ask. Not the person who was the victim of their sin, but Jesus.

All you have to do is ask Jesus to forgive your sins. He’s the one who paid for the sins by dying on the Roman cross, so it kind of makes sense when you think about it. He paid for all sins you committed in the past, the present, or the future.

If you do ask Jesus to forgive your sins, you’re good. You’ll go to Heaven as soon as you shuffle off this mortal coil. If you fail to ask Jesus to forgive your sins, you’re going straight to Hell. That’s where the Devil lives.

Happy Easter and/or April's Fool's Day - Bent Corner
The Devil. Also known as Satan. Some even call him Lucifer.

The way the system works, it doesn’t matter what type of person you’ve been on this earth. You could live the best possible life, helping those in need and choosing to always do the right thing. If you don’t ask Jesus to forgive your sins, you’re spending eternity in a giant lake of fire.

On the other hand, you can be one of history’s biggest monsters and if you ask Jesus to forgive you for everything you’ve ever done, you’re going to Heaven. That means if Adolf Hitler asked Jesus to forgive him of his sins two seconds before Eva Braun shot him in the head, Hitler went to heaven.

Happy Easter and/or April's Fool's Day - Bent Corner
Statue of Adolf Hitler praying.

That’s just the way the religion works. Hitler might be in Heaven. It all depends on whether he asked or not. Plus, Hitler was Catholic. It wouldn’t be outside the realm of possibilities to imagine Hitler praying to Jesus before he died.

If you don’t like that, take it up with Jesus. He’s the one who set up the parameters used to determine who goes to Heaven and who goes to Hell.

Today is also April Fool’s Day. It’s the one day a year unfunny people attempt to be funny by making up something stupid and passing it off as the truth. In other words, it’s the one day a year people act like Fox News. If you fall for it, you’re the fool. I greatly hate April Fool’s Day and those who participate in it.

Happy Easter and/or April's Fool's Day - Bent Corner

When the Internet first started, April Fool’s Day was bad. As time went on, I think more and more people realized how stupid the whole thing was and decided not to engage in its foolery. Good.

I don’t know why Easter and April Fool’s Day are on the same day this year. I’m not a calendar scientist, so I don’t have an explanation. I know Easter floats around on different days each year while April Fool’s Day is locked onto the first of April. If you have a problem with both Easter and April Fool’s Day falling on the same day this year, blame Easter. It’s the one that can’t commit to a single day.