Holidays

Happy birthday America!

Happy birthday America! - Bent Corner

Today is the 246th year anniversary of the United States becoming its own country. Before July 4, 1976, the original 13 states were English colonies. If it wasn’t for a bunch of slave owning white men thinking that paying tax on the tea they drink was one of the most immoral things they could be …

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Happy Easter, now let’s all get type two diabetes!

Happy Easter, now let's all get type two diabetes! - Bent Corner

Today is Easter. It’s the day Jesus Christ arose from his borrowed tomb and freaked people out. It’s also the day parents happily send their children down the road of acquiring type two diabetes by showering them with sugary treats. Jesus has risen, so plunk this brightly colored, sugar-coated marshmallow rabbit in your mouth. What …

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The truth behind the first Thanksgiving

If you live in the United States of America, today is Thanksgiving. It’s the day we Americans give thanks for all the wonderful things we have. The Pilgrims celebrated the very first Thanksgiving. They had just defeated the indigenous Wampanoags in a bloody, horrific battle. The Pilgrims attacked the Wampanoag after they noticed delicious smells wafting from the Wampanoag …

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I hate April Fool’s Day

Today is April 1st, also known as April Fool’s Day. It’s the one day a year people who are not particularly all that funny attempt to crack wise by making something up that isn’t true and passing it off as fact. For instance, telling someone they have full-blown AIDS when they don’t. It’s dumb, it’s …

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