Who’s who in ‘Rogue One: A Star Wars Story’

Rogue One: A Star Wars Story opens in theaters December 15. It tells the story of a team of rebels tasked with stealing the plans to the Death Star. These are the same plans uploaded into R2-D2 by Princes Leia in the beginning of Star Wars: A New Hope. When I was a kid, it was simply called Star Wars.

In anticipation of seeing Rogue One: A Star Wars Story, I’m reading the Catalyst: A Rogue One Novel. The book serves as a prequel to the movie. To properly experience the book, I wanted to familiarize myself with the central characters in the movie. When I read a book, I usually imagine and lock in what a character looks like pretty quickly. I wanted to make sure that if a character appears in the book, I don’t imagine them looking different than the actors who play them.

Here’s a spoiler-free breakdown of the main characters in the movie and who they’re being played by.

Jyn Erso

Who's who in 'Rogue One: A Star Wars Story' - Bent Corner
The main character in the movie. Estranged daughter of Galen Erso. A streetwise delinquent with mad fighting skills. Played by Felicity Jones.

Cassian Andor

Who's who in 'Rogue One: A Star Wars Story' - Bent Corner
A by-the-book Rebel intelligence officer tasked with keeping Jyn Erso in check. Played by Diego Luna.

Galen Erso

Who's who in 'Rogue One: A Star Wars Story' - Bent Corner
A brilliant scientist and estranged father of Galen Erso. Played by Mads Mikkelsen.

Orson Krennic

Who's who in 'Rogue One: A Star Wars Story' - Bent Corner
Director of the Advanced Weapons Research Division of the Imperial military. Responsible for the security of the Death Star project. Commands a squad of Death Troopers. Played by Ben Mendelsohn

Saw Gerrera

Who's who in 'Rogue One: A Star Wars Story' - Bent Corner

Seen as an ultimate rebel who often pushes the envelope of what is considered moral and just by Alliance leadership. Played by Forest Whitaker.

K-2SO

Who's who in 'Rogue One: A Star Wars Story' - Bent Corner

A reprogrammed Imperial security droid now loyal to the Alliance. Voiced by Alan Tudyk.

Chirrut Imwe

Who's who in 'Rogue One: A Star Wars Story' - Bent Corner

Blind warrior monk. Very spiritual. Not a Jedi, but he believes in their ways. Played by Donnie Yen.

Baze Malbus

Who's who in 'Rogue One: A Star Wars Story' - Bent Corner

Devoted protector to Chirrut Imwe. Not spiritual. Believes in the power of a good blaster over that of a hokey religion. Played by Jiang Wen.

Bodhi Rook

Who's who in 'Rogue One: A Star Wars Story' - Bent Corner

Abrasive and hot-headed, but a skilled pilot. Played by Riz Ahmed.

Death Troopers

Who's who in 'Rogue One: A Star Wars Story' - Bent Corner

The elite variant of the Galactic Empire’s stormtrooper. By “elite,” I’m assuming that means they can actually hit what they shoot at. They wear black armor and look super cool.

‘Wonder Woman’ official trailer #2

The second trailer for the upcoming Wonder Woman movie dropped, and like the first trailer, it doesn’t disappoint.

Although I enjoyed Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice more than most people, I believe that best part of the movie was Gal Gadot as Wonder Woman. When I first learned she landed the part of the Amazonian Princess, I thought it was a dumb choice. I thought she was too skinny to be the badass that I know Wonder Women to be. Could Gal Gadot play a princess? Sure. How about an Amazonian? Not so much.

Or so I thought. Gal Gadot can radiate a sense of strength and power that is surprising for someone of her slight stature. Although she looks to be too skinny to be a threat to men, one only has to watch her slow walk towards the German trench, to know that a bunch of Huns are about to meet up with their dead relatives in Hell courtesy of a skinny girl and her sword.

If anything, Gal Gadot’s thin physique makes Wonder Woman even scarier when you bear witness to the absolute carnage she can unleash with her sword, shield, and lasso.

I’m looking forward to seeing Wonder Woman. It hits theaters June 2, 2017.

Scarlet Johansson in ‘Ghost in the Shell’

Paramount and Dreamworks Pictures released the first image from the upcoming movie Ghost in the Shell. It’s a live-action version of the popular anime of the same name. The image shows Scarlet Johansson in the starring role of cyborg Major Kusanagi.

In the anime, Major Kusanagi is Japanese. Scarlet Johansson is not Japanese. Some people are bothered by this fact.

The director on the film is Rupert Sanders. He’s the hack who directed Snow White and the Huntsman, a truly awful movie. It featured Kristen Stewart in the title role and Charlize Theron as the Evil Queen. The movie didn’t work for all sorts of reasons, but one of the most glaring issues in the film was the casting. Snow White is the most beautiful woman in all the land. This gets her in all sorts of trouble with the Evil Queen, who used to be the most beautiful woman in all the land.

In what universe is Kristen Stewart more beautiful than Charlize Theron?

Kristen Stewart always has a look on her face like she just smelled Adam Carolla’s socks after some vigorous unicycling. Charlize Theron looks like Charlize Theron. At no time in the film was Kristen Stewart made to look more attractive or Charlize Theron made to look less attractive. We know Charlize Theron can be made less attractive.

It turned out Rupert Sanders was fornicating with Kristen Stewart during production of the film, so his judgment was probably… clouded.

Getting back to Scarlet Johansson playing Major Kusanagi. I don’t care that she’s not Asian. To me, it’s not a big deal. When the live-action movie based on Attack on Titan was released with an all Asian cast, I don’t remember anyone complaining. In the anime version, the characters, all except one, are western.

Attack on Titan
Attack on Titan

I don’t think this movie should even be made. The original anime is a classic. Not everything needs a movie version. In fact, most things don’t.