World of Warcraft: Mists of Pandaria aimed at appeasing our Chinese overlords

World of Warcraft: Mists of Pandaria aimed at appeasing our Chinese overlordsThe fourth expansion for the popular massively multiplayer online (MMO) World of Warcraft game, Mists of Pandaria, is being released tomorrow by Blizzard. The game has a heavy Asian theme. Players can now play as a fighting Pandaren, a creature that looks an awful lot like a real-world panda bear, a racial class that relies not on weapons to fight adversaries, but with martial arts.

You know, like Kung Fu or Karate!

Blizzard is hoping this new expansion will attract players back to the game, players who left for other games, games not called World of Warcraft. The game’s subscriber base has reportedly dropped to its lowest level, around nine million. At its peak, World of Warcraft had around 12 million paying subscribers. A month of World of Warcraft costs $14.99 a month. Subscribers get a slight discount if they subscribe for a whole six months.

Of all World of Warcraft subscribers, half are believed to be located in China. Considering this fact, it would stand to reason playing a Kung Fu Panda would be something your average Chinese person would want to do because, as everyone knows, there’s nothing Chinese people love more than martial arts and panda bears.

Considering how much of our national debt is owned by the Chinese, it’s important to keep them happy. If it will please them to prance around World of Warcraft as a panda, instead of a gnome, dwarf, or the undead, then more power to them.

As long as they keep on buying our debt, ensuring our senior citizens keep on getting their Social Security checks, I don’t care what they do.

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