I feel sorry for Antonio Brown

The Pittsburgh Steelers traded star wide receiver Antonio Brown to the Oakland Raiders. Last season Brown had 104 receptions for 1,297 yards and notched 15 touchdowns. If there was a better receiver last year, he played exclusively in a video game.Continue Reading

Did Josh McDaniels punk the Colts out of revenge for Deflategate?

New England Patriots offensive coordinator Josh McDaniels was going to become the new head coach on the Indianapolis Colts until he decided he wasn’t. The Colts released an official statement on the matter:

After agreeing to contract terms to become the Indianapolis Colts’ new head coach, New England Patriots assistant coach Josh McDaniels this evening informed us that he would not be joining our team. Although we are surprised and disappointed, we will resume our head coaching search immediately and find the right fit to lead our team and organization on and off the field.

“Agreeing to contract terms” isn’t the same thing as signing the contract. I’m assuming he never signed the contract otherwise the Colts would have probably lead with that. Plus, Josh McDaniels was still contractually obligated to the New England Patriots until after the Super Bowl. He wouldn’t have been able to sign a contract with the Colts until his time with the Patriots was over.

This could be a planned elaborate prank by the Patriots on the Colts. It was the Colts who got the wheels in motion for Deflategate. In the first quarter of the 2014 AFC Championship game, Colts linebacker D’Qwell Jackson intercepted a pass from Patriots quarterback Tom Brady. Jackson gave the ball for safekeeping to the Colts’ equipment staff. Upon inspection of the ball, the equipment staff decided the ball felt kind of squishy. It was as though it didn’t have enough air in it. They alerted game officials and all of the Patriots footballs were tested at halftime.

Did Josh McDaniels change his mind about the job offer as revenge for deflategate?

I doubt it. The Colts are a shit organization. They play in one of America’s worst cities and the owner is a degenerate drug addict.

Indianapolis Colts owner Jim Irsay.

Indianapolis is in Indiana. Have you ever been to Indiana? It’s a depressing place filled with depressing people who spend their time sitting in rocking chairs talking about going home to Jesus.

Why would anyone want to leave the Patriot’s organization to work for the Colts? I’m sure Josh McDaniels just came to his senses.

Plus, Josh McDaniels was probably told the Patriots head coaching job was his as soon as Bill Belichick retires.

I was completely wrong about Tom Brady

In the past, I’ve said some not-so-nice things about New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady. I’ve called him a cheater. I’ve compared him to Sammy Sosa. I’ve called him a spoiled baby.

Tom Brady didn’t deserve any of my criticism.

Everything I’ve ever said about Tom Brady was wrong. If I could manipulate time, I would go back and not write negative things about Tom Brady. In all honesty though, I would first go back and kill baby Hitler, but as soon as I completed my act of justifiable infanticide, I’d go back and not blog hostile things about Tom Brady.

I’ve been thinking about the whole deflategate controversy since the beginning of the 2015-16 NFL season. I’ve looked at it with fresh eyes. If the footballs used by the Patriots in the 2014-15 AFC Championship Game against the Indianapolis Colts were under-inflated, why didn’t any of the officials on the field notice? The officials handled the footballs every play. The Colts had their own footballs. The Patriots had their own footballs. If something was different between the two, the officials would have noticed.

If, after the game, the NFL determined the footballs were under-inflated, why then weren’t any of the officials disciplined for allowing the game to be played with squishy footballs?

The officials weren’t disciplined because there wasn’t a noticeable difference in the footballs.

Also, if the exact air pressure of a football is so important and sacred to the integrity of the game, why does the NFL allow each team to provide their own footballs? If the amount of air in a football was important, the NFL would provide the footballs. The teams would not be allowed to provide their own footballs. The air pressure in the footballs would be checked constantly throughout the game. There would be sideline laboratories staffed with expert scientists using state-of-the-art pneumatic pressure instruments, ensuring the footballs were properly inflated.

In retrospect, the whole deflategate thing was stupid. It’s the worst kind of controversy: a non-controversy. I think I allowed my own personal biases against Boston sports teams and their insufferable fans to cloud and contaminate my opinion. Like most people, I associate Boston sports teams with obnoxious, blowhards like Bill Simmons and Sarah Silverman. I shouldn’t have done that.

I’ll try to be a better man in the future.

Tom Brady court appeal denied

New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady will finally have to serve the 4-game suspension levied on him by NFL commissioner Roger Goodell back in May of 2015.

Brady tried to get the U.S. Court Appeals for the Second Circuit to rehear his case. They issued a one-page document earlier today denying his petition.  His only chance now is to get his case heard by the U.S. Supreme Court, something they will almost certainly not do.

Then again, the U.S. Supreme Court named George W. Bush the president even though Al Gore, inventor of both the Internet and global warming, received the most votes. Who knows what the top court in all the land will do at any given time. Most of its members are too old to be Walmart door greeters. We shouldn’t be overly surprised by anything they do.

The cheating cheater known as Tom Brady is a spoiled baby. He cheated in the AFC Championship Game, using under inflated, easier to catch footballs. Instead of taking his suspension like a man, or what passes as a man in Massachusetts, he tried to use the courts to get out of paying the price for his wretched dishonesty. I wish he could be suspended for more than four games. He wasted everyone’s time. He should be penalized for that.

I hate Tom Brady. Religious cult leader and conveyor of folksy wisdom Will Rogers once said he hadn’t met a man he didn’t like. I would like to point out that Will Rogers obviously never met Tom Brady.

ESPN fired Bill Simmons

ESPN, the self-proclaimed worldwide leader in sports, fired its long-time podcaster, columnist, creator of content, and provocateur, Bill Simmons. Grandland, the website founded by Simmons, will remain under the control of ESPN. As of this morning, Simmons is still listed prominently on the Grantland website and he’s still identified as its editor-in-chief.

I’m surprised this didn’t happen sooner. He’s been suspended by ESPN many times for saying controversial things on Twitter and his podcast. Last year, he was suspended three weeks for saying on his The B.S. Report podcast that NFL commissioner Roger Goodell was lying about the league’s handling of the Ray Rice domestic violence case.

When your employer suspends you for three weeks, you have to figure the next rung on the punishment ladder is termination.

The final straw appears to be an unsanctioned appearance on The Dan Patrick Show. ESPN employees are forbidden on appearing on the former ESPN anchor’s radio show without permission. Simmons appeared on the show on Thursday, May 7, without a signed permission slip. He was then let go by ESPN the very next day.

I used to listen to The B.S. Report fairly regularly, but recently, I’ve found it impossible to listen to. Simmons has a certain shtick about him and that shtick can go a long way. Also, he has a weird nastily-toned voice. It can be grating to the ears. He recently began another podcast for ESPN, an NBA centric show called Bill Don’t Lie. I never listened to it, but from what I understand, it was pretty awful.

I was looking forward to hearing his take on the Wells report, the special report commissioned by the NFL over allegations that Tom Brady and the rest of the New England Patriots cheated in the AFC Championship with underinflated footballs. Bill Simmons is originally from the New England area and can always be counted on to be a unapologetic homer for any New England area sports team. Like most male sports fans from New England, Bill Simmons has a heterosexual crush on Tom Brady.

It would have been entertaining listening to him excuse Brady’s cheating.

 

Pete Carroll loses Super Bowl XLIX

Last night’s Super Bowl has got to be one of the strangest games I think I’ve ever watched. The Seattle Seahawks had the game in the bag. They had the ball on the one-yard line with 26 seconds left on the clock. They had running back Marshawn Lynch in the backfield. All they had to do is give the ball to Beastmode and let him do his thing. He averaged 5.0 yards a carry in the post-season.

Instead of doing the logical and obvious thing, give the ball to Lynch, the one player born for this one moment in time, Pete Carroll called for a passing play. Not just any passing play, a stupid slant pass to the exact area the New England Patriots defenders had to think Lynch would be coming. Patriots safety Malcolm Butler jumped the route and instead of trying to stop Lynch from taking the ball into the end zone, all he had to do and intercept the ball.

Butler, an undrafted rookie out of West Alabama, made his first career interception. He had Pete Carroll to thank for it.

After the game, when asked to explain his reasoning for throwing the ball instead of giving it to Marshawn Lynch, this season’s leader in touchdowns, Pete Carroll had this to say:

It’s not the right matchup for us to run the football. so on second down we were throwing the ball really to kind of waste that play.

Mission accomplished. Not only did they waste that play, they wasted the game, and the entire season.

Photo: AP Photo/Michael Conroy