Derrick Rose to have knee surgery… again

Chicago Bulls point guard Derrick Rose has a torn meniscus in his right knee and will undergo surgery to repair it. It’s the same exact injury he had in 2013. This was after he tore the anterior cruciate ligament in his left knee in 2012.

It’s unclear when he injured his knee this time. He had played well before the All-Star break, but not so much since.  He’s averaged less than 11 points a game with a 23.5 shooting percentage in the three games since the All-Star break.

Rose is 26. It’s clear at this point in his career that he has crummy knees, right?

Then again, maybe it’s something esle. He’s paid a lot of money by Adidas to wear their shoes. He even has his own line of shoes and clothing with Adidas. What if it’s not his knees that are the problem, but the shoes he’s wearing? When you hurt yourself and you don’t know how you did it or even when you did it, it just might be your shoes.

If and when Derrick Rose comes back, it might be a good idea to wear different shoes, shoes not designed by Adidas. Maybe he ought to wear Jordans. When was the last time someone blew out a knee wearing Jordans? It might be a good idea to take some of the millions Adidas has paid him to hire some lawyers to get him out of his contract with Adidas.

Shelly Sterling named 'Clippers' Number One Fan'

The NBA officially declared yesterday that former Microsoft muckety-muck Steve Ballmer is now the owner of the Los Angeles Clippers. It cost him only $2 billion. That’s OK though, because he’s worth around $20 billion. One might think that when you pay that much for a team, that the sale would be clean, without any extra obligations.

That is not the case with the sale of the Los Angeles Clippers.

The deal involves a series of perks for Shelly Sterling, longtime wife of former Clippers owner, racist scumbag Donald Sterling. This perks include:

  • $200 million funneled into The Shelly Sterling Foundation, an organization to be dedicated to benefiting children, minorities, and abused women. As the name implies, Sterling will get to run the foundation.
  • Two courtside tickets to all Clippers home games.
  • Ten tickets in sections 101 or 111 to all Clippers home games.
  • Six parking spots in Lot C for each Clippers game.
  • Twelve VIP passes to all of the fancy lounges and clubs in the Staples Center.
  • Three championship rings if the Clippers ever win a title.
  • Honorary title of “Owner Emeritus” and “Clippers’ Number One Fan” for the rest of her life.

Why Steve Ballmer would want to own the Los Angeles Clippers is beyond me, especially when it means he will have to deal with Shelly Sterling on a continuous basis. She’s just as racist and just as awful as her husband. I would rather drink a cup of Ebola than root for a team who’s number one fan is Shelly Sterling.

ESPN (fake) suspends Dan Le Batard

ESPN has suspended radio host and TV personality Dan Le Batard two whole days for placing a message directed at LeBron James on an Akron, Ohio billboard. The ad suggests that James owes the city of Miami gratitude for going there and winning two championships.

Le Batard is a Miami native and occasionally writes columns for the Miami Herald. Evidently Le Batard is upset that James never “thanked” Miami Heat fans.

This is the billboard that earned Le Batard an extra long weekend:

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The message communicated on the billboard is almost as absurd as the fake two-day suspension. As if James needs to thank the city of Miami or anyone else for going to the Heat and winning two championships. The Miami Heat went to the NBA Finals the four years when James was with them. If James wasn’t there, they wouldn’t have gone to the NBA Finals, let alone win two championships. Just watch how deep into the post-season this year the Heat go without James. My guess is that it won’t be too far.

How designed this ugly billboard? Is that Comic Sans font at the top?

ESPN shouldn’t have been surprised or caught off guard by Le Batard erecting this stupid billboard. Le Batard tried to place an ad in an Ohio newspaper, any Ohio newspaper, that basically said the same thing, but he couldn’t find a newspaper willing to sell him the ad space. Didn’t ESPN know this? Among other things, ESPN is supposedly a news organization. How can they not know that one of their paid personalities wanted to troll LeBron James? Maybe they should create Google Alerts for all their paid personalities.

Steve Ballmer signs deal to buy Clippers for $2 billion

Former Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer has signed an agreement with the Sterling family trust to purchase the Los Angeles Clippers for $2 billion.

The Clippers are the third most popular basketball ball team in Los Angeles, after the Lakers and then the UCLA Bruins. After the deal is completed, it will be the richest deal ever paid for an American sports team. The Los Angeles Dodgers sold for $2.15 billion, but that deal included Dodger Stadium and the massive, but dangerous parking lot. The Clippers don’t have their own arena. They share the Staples Center with the Lakers and the Kings.

I don’t understand this deal. The second-richest contract for an NBA team was earlier this year when the Milwaukee Bucks sold for $550 million.

Steve Ballmer is supposedly worth $20 billion, so I guess it’s not a lot of money when it’s put into context. Still, if the Clippers are worth $2 billion, what are the Lakers worth?

Los Angeles is a weird sports town. It can’t support an NFL team, but one of its two professional basketball teams, the least popular of the two, is supposedly worth $2 billion.

Donald Sterling threatens to sue the NBA

Remember when NBA commissioner Adam Silver banned Los Angeles Clippers owner Donald Sterling for life? Yeah, about that. Sterling has hired high-priced antitrust lawyer Maxwell Blecher and is vowing to fight the NBA, claiming that he has done nothing wrong.

In Sterling’s defense, I’m sure he believes that.

He’s been a terrible human being for decades. He’s done far worse things than telling his mistress/personal assistant that he didn’t want her to bring black people to basketball games. Donald Sterling is a slum lord who routinely discriminated against people by refusing to rent apartments to people because of the color of their skin. Housing discrimination is far worse than getting angry at your skeevy mistress because she posted a photo of herself on Instagram standing with Magic Johnson.

Donald Sterling is a billionaire, and he’s a lawyer. As Jesus once said, it’s easier to get a camel to go through the eye of a needle than it is to get a billionaire lawyer to do something they don’t want to do.

It seems that Donald Sterling doesn’t want to go away quietly.

Donald Sterling banned from NBA for being Donald Sterling

I’d prefer if the team was just kicked out of the league and the players be allowed to sign with other teams.

Donald Sterling, owner of the Los Angeles Clippers, found out the hard way that Adam Silver, the newly crowned commissioner of the NBA, is not someone to be trifled with. Silver announced yesterday that Sterling is banned from the NBA for life. Considering that he’s eighty years old, that may not be for very long. Also, Silver said he’s calling for the other 29 owners of NBA teams to hold a vote to force Sterling to sell the Clippers. Lastly, Silver also fined Sterling $2.5 million, the most that an owner can be fined by the NBA.

Adam Silver made it abundantly clear that, unlike he predecessor, he has no patience for Sterling’s racist shenanigans.

Good.

I’d prefer it if this racist old coot didn’t have to sell the Clippers. It bothers me that when he sells the team, he will pocket a windfall. He paid only $12.5 million for the Clippers back in 1981. When he sells it, he will rake in considerably more. He ran the team into the ground for decades, yet when he sells, he will be adding a substantial amount it his already massive fortune.

That just doesn’t seem right.

I’d prefer if the team was just kicked out of the league and the players be allowed to sign with other teams. I don’t know if that is possible under the NBA constitution, but it should be.