Marvel Comics retconned the hell out of one of its most prized pieces of intellectual property last week. They made Captain America a Hydra sleeper agent. Not only did they make Steve Rogers a Hydra agent, they did it by adding it to his backstory. We see that he and his mother were recruited by Hydra back in 1926. That means everything Steve Rogers has done in the past 75 years as Captain America has been done by a Hydra sleeper agent.

To drive home the point that Captain America is evil, we see him murder Jack Flag.

At least it looked like Captain America murdered Jack Flag. He chucked him out the back of an aircraft without a parachute. Then again, Marvel might have retconned Jack Flag so that he had the power of flight, or maybe he’s actually Thor.

I think Thor is a woman now, so I doubt he’s Thor.

I imagine hardcore fans of Captain America are pretty distraught over this. The writer who wrote Steve Rogers Captain America #1, the comic the retcon took place, has reportedly received death threats on social media. Although I don’t support or condone death threats, even fake ones on social media, I can certainly see how someone could be upset over this.

Imagine someone reading Captain America books for years, spending thousands of dollars on Captain America collectibles only to find out that he was a Hydra agent the whole time. Some people have a strong emotional connection to comic book characters. There are people who have had Captain America tattooed on their body, not because of how he looked, but because of what he represented.

I’ve never been a fan of Captain America

Captain America always seemed a bit too patriotic, almost as though he was trying to compensate for something. I imagined he was the type of guy who would always try to get you to join him in reciting the Pledge of Allegiance every 15 minutes. You love America Steve, we get it. Now give it a rest.

Then there’s the way Steve Rogers obtained his superpowers. He was a hapless weakling until they injected him with Super-Soldier Serum. In other words, they gave him performance enhancers to make him into something he wasn’t. He was Lance Armstrong before Lance Armstrong. At least Lance Armstrong was pretty good at riding a bicycle before taking performance enhancers. The same cannot be said for Steve Rogers. Without performance enhancers, he was nothing.

Sometimes comic books can be really stupid. Captain America retconned as a Hydra sleeper agent? This is one of those times.