I feel sorry for Antonio Brown

The Pittsburgh Steelers traded star wide receiver Antonio Brown to the Oakland Raiders. Last season Brown had 104 receptions for 1,297 yards and notched 15 touchdowns. If there was a better receiver last year, he played exclusively in a video game.Continue Reading

Alex Smith will be out for the entire 2019 NFL season

The Washington Redskins are already planning their 2019 NFL season to be without the quarterback services of Alex Smith. You may remember Smith suffered a gruesome compound fracture to his right in a game against the Houston Texans on November 18, 2018.

Smith’s injury was so severe, it required over a month in the hospital and numerous procedures to remove infected tissue.

It should then be no surprise that he will not play football this season.

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Washington Redskins Montae Nicholson arrested for assault

As if the Washington Redskins season couldn’t get any worse. Defensive back Montae Nicholson was arrested yesterday along with his girlfriend Sydney A. Maggiore.Continue Reading

It looks like the Los Angeles Chargers are legit good

When I heard the San Diego Chargers were moving to Los Angeles, I thought they would be the Los Angeles Clippers of the NFL. Just another San Diego team moving to Los Angeles. They obviously wanted the benefits of having one of the greatest cities in the world as its base of operations.

I also thought it was strange for Los Angeles to go from not having an NFL team for twenty years to suddenly having two teams, the Rams and the Chargers.

Are the Chargers the Clippers of the NFL?

In my mind, I couldn’t shake the idea that the Chargers were just like the Clippers. I hate the Clippers with the white-hot intensity of a thousand suns.

I was wrong. The Chargers are not like the Clippers. First of all, the Chargers are not forever linked to a racist owner. They also never announced the former racist owner’s wife, a racist in her own right as their official number one fan.

Something else that sets the Chargers apart from the Clippers is the Chargers are good.

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The Chargers went into to Kansas City last night and beat the Chiefs 29-28 to clinch a playoff spot and tie the Chiefs for first place in the AFC West, but not really. Both teams are now 11-3, but the Chiefs get a slight advantage because they have a better in-division record.

Los Angeles’ other NFL team, the Rams, have a record of 11-2. They stand alone at the top of the NFC West.

I wanted to get behind the Rams after it was announced they were leaving St. Louis for Los Angeles. I just couldn’t do it. As a kid, it bugged me the Rams moved from Los Angeles to Anaheim. Then, years later, they moved to St. Louis. They ended up winning a super bowl, something they never could do in Southern California.

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Jeff Fisher (Photo: Andy Clayton-King/AP)

Then, when they moved back to LA, they had Jeff Fisher as their head coach. I cannot express how much I dislike Fisher and his stupid mustache. His creepy smile has been known to cause women to go into immediate menopause and turn holy water into vinegar.

St. Louis is a terrible place

There was another problem I had with the Rams: they still have that St. Louis stink on them.

I’m not a big fan of St. Louis. I’ve been there a few times when I worked as a field service engineer for Gretag Imaging. They were a Swiss company that made photo-finishing equipment. I can say St. Louis was one of the worst places I ever been. It was like the entire city was on the bad part of town. I once stopped at a grocery store to buy Tylenol and I feared I was going to get robbed. Not by other shoppers, but by the people working there.

The best thing about St. Louis is the giant arch. The best way to see it is driving Interstate 70 making sure not to stop.

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The St. Louis Arch (Photo: Rudy Balasko)

I probably could have gotten behind the Rams if when they fled Southern California, they went anywhere else other than St. Louis.

The Chargers, unlike the Rams, have no stink upon them. The moved to LA from San Diego, but the Chargers played their first season (1960) in the AFL in Los Angeles. They moved to San Diego before the AFL 1961 season.

In conclusion

The Chargers give past and present Los Angeles residents an alternative team to support.  Even though I haven’t lived in the Los Angeles area for over 34 years, I still keep a fondness for the area’s sports teams. It’s where I grew up. Unlike the Rams, I can get behind the Chargers. I’m glad they came to their senses and left Northern Tijuana and returned home to LA where they belong.

I hate the Green Bay Packers with the white hot heat of a thousand suns

Week eleven of the 2018 NFL schedule has come and gone and the Green Bay Packers are now 4-5-1. In other words, they’ve played 10 games so far this season and won only four of them. Good. I hate the Packers and it makes me happy when they play like a giant bucket of suck.

When tracking Super Bowl odds, the Packers’ chances of winning Super Bowl 53 (Super Bowl LIII if you are a citizen of the Roman Empire) have been steadily getting worse since the 2018 season began.

I do not understand the national obsession with the Green Bay Packers

When the NFL announced the 2018 national TV schedule, the Green Bay Packers were scheduled for five nationally televised games. That’s five games too many. Instead of subjecting America to the Green Bay Packers, national TV networks should try to be more responsible and show things more worthy of the nation’s airwaves. Maybe a live telecast of someone putting Ikea furniture together or a middle-aged prairie woman churning butter. Anything would be better than watching the Green Bay Packers.

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Middle-aged prairie woman churning butter.

In fact, considering how much people in Wisconsin fetishize dairy products and coronary disease, a middle-aged prairie woman churning butter might just be a hit with viewers in the Packers’ television market. We won’t know unless a network gives it a try.

Have you ever been to Green Bay?

Green Bay, Wisconsin is by far the smallest city with its own NFL team. Current population numbers show the city has less than 106,000 people living there. That’s tiny compared to most cities with their own NFL team. Lambeau Field, the stadium in which the Packers play, seats 81,441. That works out to be 76.8 percent of the city.

Not everyone who goes to a Green Bay Packers game lives in the tiny village of Green Bay. I’m sure there are people there from the surrounding area who cannot drive their uncle’s tractor all the way to Minnesota or Chicago to watch the Vikings or the Bears. It sucks to be them.

I hate Aaron Rodgers

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Aaron Rodgers

If there’s a bigger jerk in football than Aaron Rodgers, I cannot think of one. I’m sure there’s a third-string linebacker somewhere who has the personality of a cinder block, but Aaron Rodgers is a first-ballot Hall of Famer. Considering how many sports writers have man-crushes on Rodgers, I’m almost surprised they don’t try to enshrine him in Canton before he even retires. For all his accomplishments, Rodgers seems to love giving people the stink eye.

Considering his accomplishments and accolades, it’s annoying to see Rodgers look so mad all the time. How many millions in the bank or MVP awards does he need before he cracks a smile? To turn that frown upside down? Spock smiles more than Aaron Rodgers does and Spock is half Vulcan.

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Mr. Spock

Spock’s never won a Super Bowl. I doubt he’s even watched a Super Bowl. He would rather play the Vulcan harp than watch football. Now that I think about it, most of the time, so would I. At least then I wouldn’t worry about Joe Buck and Troy Aikman giving me ear cancer.

In conclusion

My hope is that the Green Bay Packers lose their next six games. Considering how well they’ve been this season at not winning games, I believe their chances are quite good.  Ending the season at 4-11-1 would make me very happy.

Buffalo Bills make Minnesota Vikings look like Canadian high school team

The Buffalo Bills beat the Minnesota Vikings yesterday 27-6. It was the Bills’ first win of the season. The Vikings now have a very Cleveland Browns type record at 1-1-1.

Bookmakers in Las Vegas were giving degenerate gamblers 17 points so they would place a bet on the Bills.  When bookmakers give odds, their goal is to get an even amount of degenerate gamblers on each team. They hope to make their money on the vig, the amount charged to the winner. Yesterday’s upset was the largest in 23 years.

I don’t bet on football. I only bet on the weather and Nerf cockfights. It’s like regular cockfighting, but the combatants wear Nerf boxing gloves over their talons so the cocks don’t get hurt. It’s good clean fun. I learned all about it in the Boy Scouts.

Yesterday’s game is the reason you watch the football. Even though you think you know what will happen, you never really know.