Dave Bautista threatens to quit ‘Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3’

Dave Bautista, former WWE wrestler, and current actor said he will not be in Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 if Disney doesn’t use James Gunn’s script, one way or another, he will not be in the movie. From Shortlist, a website best known for its comprehensive lists written by people standing 4-10 or less, published an interview with Bautista. From that interview:

“Nobody’s defending his tweets, but this was a smear campaign on a good man,” he said, speaking to ShortList’s Tom Ellen. “I spoke to Chris Pratt the day after it happened and he’s a bit religious so he wanted time to pray and figure it out, but I was more like: fuck this. This is bullshit. James is one of the kindest, most decent people I’ve met.”

Bautista said Gunn had already turned in the script for Guardians of the Galaxy: Volume 3. A replacement director for the film, due to shoot early next year, has not yet been announced.

“Where I’m at right now is that if [Marvel] don’t use that script, then I’m going to ask them to release me from my contract, cut me out or recast me.

“I’d be doing James a disservice if I didn’t.”

 

I wish I had a friend like Dave Bautista

Dave Bautista threatens to quit 'Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3' - Bent Corner
What a friend we have in Caucasian Jesus.

Growing up in the Lancaster First Assembly of God church, there was a song we often sang. It was called, “What a Friend We Have in Jesus.” I know Jesus Christ died for our sins and all, but I think I’d rather have Dave Bautista for a friend. What he’s threatening to do is so punk rock. It’s awesome.

I can remember listening to an interview with James Gunn talking about the initial casting of Guardians of the Galaxy. Gunn said something to the effect that he thought he was going to have to settle for someone to play the part of Drax the Destroyer. He figured he would never be able to find someone who had the physical presence needed for Drax, but also have the comedic timing his take on the character required.  Gunn then found Dave Bautista.

Much like how Disney will never be able to find another actor to play the part of Drax the Destroyer, Bautista will never find a part as special as Drax. He was born to play the part. This is one of the reasons I find his stand so admirable.

To be honest, when Disney fired Gunn for inappropriate Twitter tweets made seven years ago, I assumed they were getting out of the who Guardians of the Galaxy business. I was wrong.

I can’t imagine Disney not using Gunn’s script if they already have it. It’s not like they pulled his two earlier movies from their back catalog. Afterall, those two movies are a lot closer to the time Gunn made the offensive tweets than a third Guardians would be.

They need to stop making fake Godzilla movies

The trailer for the upcoming movie, Godzilla: King of the Monsters, was released at the San Diego Comic-Con and then for the rest of the world.

I will not be seeing the movie because I’m a fan of Godzilla. I have been my entire life.

You might ask since I’m a fan of the character, why won’t I be watching this movie? Because this new movie doesn’t look like the giant reptilian monster I love. It doesn’t look like the one I grew up watching. Here’s a side-by-side comparison:

They need to stop making fake Godzilla movies - Bent Corner

The new fake one is on the left. The real one is on the right. Notice the difference?

For some reason, modern movie studios are consumed with making Godzilla not look like Godzilla. They make the head and arms way too small. Essentially, they want their monster to not look like a guy in a rubber suit. I say when you go out of your way to make him not look like a guy in a rubber suit, you are not making Godzilla. You might as well call the monster something else.

It’s a lot like when they make Frankenstein’s monster not look like Boris Karloff as Frankenstein’s monster.

They need to stop making fake Godzilla movies - Bent Corner
Boris Karloff as Frankenstein’s monster.

Unless Frankenstein’s monster has a flat head and bolts in its neck, it’s not Frankenstein’s monster.

Should Godzilla go back to being a guy in a rubber suit?

The late Haruo Nakajima donned the Godzilla suit in 12 movies.

I’m not saying they need to go back to making Godzilla movies with a guy in a rubber suit. That would be nice, but it’s not necessary. They now make Godzilla movies with CGI. Just because they use CGI to create Godzilla doesn’t mean Godzilla has to be a tiny headed monster. They can use CGI to make Godzilla, just make it look like what the world knows as Godzilla.

If they can’t do that, then by all means, they need to go back to Godzilla being a guy in a rubber suit.

Who knew James Gunn used to be a Twitter edgelord?

James Gunn, director of fine movies such as SlitherGuardians of the Galaxy, and Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 used to be a Twitter edgelord. The problem is when he stopped being a Twitter edgelord and decided to be a respectable movie director, he failed to go on Twitter and delete is edgy tweets.

I don’t understand why Gunn didn’t hire a social media person to manage his online content. He’s now a famous movie director connected to Marvel Studios which is owned by The Walt Disney Company. Why didn’t he have someone scrub this old Twitter stuff a long time ago?

He should have deleted all his old tweets as soon as he signed on to write and direct Guardians of the Galaxy. That’s what a normal human would have done.

It couldn’t have come at a worse time for James Gunn. The San Diego Comic-Con (SDCC) is taking place and he was scheduled to appear. I’m sure that’s not going to happen now. The SDCC is like the Daytona 500 for nerds. The Daytona 500 is NASCAR’s Super Bowl. The Super Bowl is the NFL’s FIFA World Cup. So obviously, right now is a terrible time for something like this to emerge.

It will be interesting to see if Marvel Studios fires him from Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3. As terrible and unoriginal as his edgelord tweets were, his movies are very good.

Update

Marvel Studios has fired James Gunn.

‘Kong: Skull Island’ was boring and I did not like it

I finally got around to watching Kong: Skull Island and I have to admit, I didn’t like it. I thought it was boring.

Unlike every other King Kong movie made, this one is different in that it takes place in 1973. World War Vietnam is wrapping up. Advances in satellite photography have made it possible to see a secret island in the south Pacific called Skull Island. A government task force is sent to investigate including an Army helicopter squadron called the Sky Devils led by Lieutenant Colonel Preston Packard, subtly played by Samuel L Jackson.

'Kong: Skull Island' was boring and I did not like it - Bent Corner
Military genius Lieutenant Colonel Preston Packard played by Samuel L Jackson.

I’m kidding. Samuel L Jackson has never played anything subtly. His worst, most over-the-top performances seem to always involve his character wearing a hat. In Kong: Skull Island, his character wears a Vietnam era floppy boonie hat. Lieutenant Colonel Packard is angry because Kong wiped out his fancy helicopter squadron (spoiler alert) and wants to kill Kong in revenge.

If Samuel L Jackson’s character wanted to carry out revenge against the party most responsible for the destruction of his helicopter squadron, than he needed to start with himself. His squadron was a poorly lead, undisciplined group of misfits taken out by a giant gorilla who lacked the ability to fly. It should have been an easy thing for one helicopter to take out King Kong, let alone a whole squadron. Fly to a higher altitude and have the door gunner target the giant gorilla’s head with an M60 machine gun. End of movie, roll credits.  I don’t care how big you are. Take a couple hundred rounds of 7.62 mm to the face, you’re going to giant gorilla heaven.

'Kong: Skull Island' was boring and I did not like it - Bent Corner
The Vietnam era M60 machine gun.

I think the movie might have been better without the Sky Devils.

Don’t tell me ‘Birdman’ was the best movie of 2014

I guess the 2015 Oscars had a real anti-superhero vibe to it. I wouldn’t know first-hand because I didn’t watch it. The Oscars have become totally irrelevant to me. I think they’ve always been a poor indicator of greatness, it just took me a while to realize it. For instance, according to the members of the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences, the organization whose members vote for Oscar winners, the movie Shakespeare in Love was a better movie than Saving Private Ryan.

There’s a term for people who believe things like that, they’re called crack addicts.

This year’s batch of Best Picture nominees was a real head-scratcher. Missing from the nominations was Guardians of the Galaxy, by far the best movie I watched last year. I’m not alone. A lot of people went to the theaters to see Guardians of the Galaxy. It has a 91% rating on Rotten Tomatoes. It grossed $774.2 million worldwide. Guardians of the Galaxy was a well-crafted and highly entertaining movie. The movie’s director, James Gunn, was able to bring life to a CGI talking racoon and a giant walking, sort-of-talking tree. The fact that it couldn’t even get a nomination for Best Picture speaks more about the absurdity of the Oscars than it does the greatness of Guardians of the Galaxy.

What’s even worse, Birdman, a terrible movie about a washed-up actor made famous for playing a superhero “birdman” in movies, trying to put on a Broadway play based on a short story by Raymond Carver, was not only nominated for Best Picture, it actually won.

Huh?

I thought Birdman was an overly pretentious, unnecessary middle finger to the genre of comic book movies. It was filmed in a way that made it look like one long continuous camera shot. At times, I was paying more attention to this stupid camera trick than I was to the performance of the actors in the scene, which is unfortunate because as awful as Birdman was, it had a great cast.

I’ll freely admit that Birdman was not for me. I was not its intended audience. To enjoy Birdman, you must hate superhero movies. I enjoy superhero movies, the ones that are well made. I enjoy a lot of movie genres.  Just don’t tell me that Birdman was the best movie of 2014. Because it wasn’t.

If you think Birdman was great, wait five years. In five years, even pretentious snobs will have forgotten about Birdman, just like they have already forgotten about 2011’s Best Picture Oscar winner The Artist.

the-artist-2011-a21

That didn’t even take five years.