Luke Skywalker used to shoot these back home in his T-16

So this is what a wombat looks like. The mystery is finally solved.

I found this photo over on Yahoo in the photo section of Yahoo News. This evidently was one of the most emailed photos for yesterday. I enjoy going there to see what photos people are emailing to each other. The photos usually fall into different categories: fashion models in their underwear or cute baby animals.

These wombats are from the Chicago Zoological Society’s Brookfield Zoo. The baby wombat’s name is “Joey” and the mother’s name is “Kambora”.

Now that I know what a wombat looks like, I have to wonder why Luke Skywalker was bragging about shooting them. When being briefed on the mission to take out the Death Star, he told everyone he used to bullseye wombats in his T-16 back home on the Tatooine, the Rosamond, California of the Star Wars universe. He also claimed that they were not much bigger than two meters. From the photo, they’re a lot smaller than two meters. I think he was exaggerating his story a bit to make it sound somehow more impressive.

Luke Skywalker is a psychopath

Leia_luke_kissI never liked Luke Skywalker. There was just something about him that rubbed me the wrong way. If he wasn’t trying to suck face with his own sister, he was bragging about killing cute defensive animals. I’m surprised he didn’t try to tell everyone about the time he got into a bare knuckle fist fight with a Jawa. He would undoubtedly leave out the part about Jawas only being 3 feet tall or the fact that the Jawa kicked his ass.

Luke Skywalker is a sister kissing, animal killing jerk.

18 thoughts on “Luke Skywalker used to shoot these back home in his T-16”

  1. Womprats? Are you sure? You are probably going by the re-re-re-edited version of Star Wars. I’m talking about the one where Han shot Greedo first and Luke bragged about killing these cute and cuddly Wompbats.

  2. Yeah, you guys are right. It was womprats. Schooly emailed me a scan from a Star Wars comic he has in his personal collection that clearly shows Luke said womprats. I stand corrected.

    I still think Luke Skywalker is a dick.

  3. Millions? I’m totally calling ‘bullshit’ on you, Sloofus. Who exactly did he save?

    And if you reference any novels or things in the “Expanded Universe,” I reserve the right to kick you in the nards.

  4. I fail to follow your logic. You say that wombats (which I see you have been corrected about) are smaller than two meters and that Luke must have exaggerated their size to seem “more” impressive. Wouldn’t he want to exaggerate their lack of size if he wanted to seem cool. Bigger targets equal less impressive. He was obviously trying to be optimistic and make the others feel confident.

  5. Its wamprat, and luke is a fucking jedi people. It was a one in a million shot. with no targeting system!

  6. I Googled womprat after hearing Mando call Baby Yoda a womprat and I’m glad to see the debate between womprats and wombats has finally been settled. I have to say that Rick’s comeback about the teacher showing up at the same house as Chris Hansen with Taco Bell and condoms had me dying with laughter! I’m going to have to use that one!

Leave a Comment

Scroll to Top