I like watching Judge Judy. I find it extremely entertaining. I find the whole process of two people going before a televised small claims court and arguing their case in front of millions of people entirely fascinating. Ironically, I get the feeling that many of the litigants going before Judge Judy have never bothered to watch the show.
That’s too bad.
I can not help but think that if they had simply watched a few episodes of Judge Judy, they may have learned things that would have helped them avoid a lot of grief and very public humiliation.
These things include:
- Before you appear in Judge Judy’s court, you will be required to submit a written statement detailing your case. Much of what Judge Judy decides will be determined from your written statement. Make sure you do a good job on your written statement. Get someone who is smarter then you to help you with your written statement. Study your written statement before you appear on the show. Do not come into her courtroom and contradict your own written statement.
- Um is not an answer. She hates it when when people preface an answer with um. Do not do it. It is preferable to have a few seconds of uncomfortable silence then for you to preface your answer with um.
- Stand up straight and do not cross your arms. Do not lean on the table.
- Look her in the eye when you speak to her. Do not look away or off to the side.
- Do not raise your hand just because you think you have something to say. You will get your turn to speak.
- If it appears you are winning the case, stop talking. Do not interrupt Judge Judy to add anything while she is questioning the other litigant.
- Answer simple questions with either Yes or No, or preferably Yes your Honor or No your Honor.
- If you have evidence to present to Judge Judy, do not attempt to approach the bench and physically hand it to her. Officer Petri Byrd (the bailiff) will stop working on his crossword puzzle and come to you to gather your evidence and present it to her. Under no circumstances should you leave your table and approach Judge Judy.
- Do not tell her something someone who is not in the courtroom supposedly said. She will tell you that it is hearsay and she will not listen to hearsay. Judge Judy does not like hearsay. It does not matter how you try to reword it.
- Dress for the show as if you were going on a job interview. The less skin showing, the better. Think about leaving any exposed body piercings at home.
