Bent Corner

Science fiction blog io9 has an article explaining the Jack Kirby created characters from DC’s Fourth World line of books. The characters have been popping up in DC books as of late and reportedly they are the core characters in this summer’s big event Final Crisis.

I wouldn’t actually know since I am not reading it.

In fact, I’m not reading any DC Universe comics right now. They are just too hard to understand. It seems the reader is required to have an extensive knowledge of the history of the DC Universe and that’s something I just don’t have. I wouldn’t know a Mother Box from a bread box. When reading Amazons Attack!, I had no idea who the gray haired, heavy set woman revealed on the last page was. In fact, I thought it was Beatrice Arthur. I had to go online and do some reading to find out it was a character from the New Gods line called Granny Goodness.

Granny Who?

I have a strong suspicion that I’m not alone on this. All three of the New Gods books in the 70’s were canceled because of low sales. This means not an awful lot of people were reading them. How then are readers today supposed to know everything there is to know about the characters from New Gods?

I just don’t get it.

Writer: PETER DAVID
Pencils: JORGE LUCAS
Inks: ROBERT CAMPANELLA
Colors: BRAD ANDERSON
Lettering: SIMON BOWLAND
48 PAGES, $3.99

It’s been a while since I’ve enjoyed a comic this much. It had everything I like to find in a comic. The writing was good, the art was good, and it told a complete and self contained story. I didn’t have to hunt down other books in a completely different series and read them first to find out what was going on. What’s to find out? The Hulk is tired of of dealing with puny humans and just wants to be left alone. He decides the only way he can be left alone is if he goes to Antarctica.

Peter David comes up with some really funny Hulk-esque dialog. Other then the part where the lead scientist incorrectly says that global warming is causing the hole in the ozone layer, the writing was good. It’s been a good while since I’ve gotten my science facts from a comic book, so the gaff on the causes of ozone depletion isn’t really all that important. At least to me it isn’t. It’s the Hulk. A super-human character wearing purple pants that derived his power from being exposed to massive amounts of Gamma radiation.

Argentinean Jorge Lucas does a fantastic job with the pencils. His art has a very Jack Kirby style to it. I like the look of it, especially in a Hulk book.

This comic also includes the Official Handbook of the Marvel Universe entries for Hulk and Fin Fang Foom. It was fun to read. I didn’t know that Dr. Robert Bruce Banner was born in Dayton, Ohio. That certainly explains a lot.

It also includes a reprint of STRANGE TALES #89. It’s funny, goofy, and more then just a little racist.

If you haven’t already, check this book out. It’s well worth four bucks.

I just got done reading Amazons Attack #6. In hindsight, I wish I’d done something more constructive with my time and money. Like maybe reading old phone books from cities I have never been to.

I hate to say that Amazons Attack sucked because the artwork was really very good. The artist for this series was Pete Woods and the writer was Will Pfeifer. It would be easy to blame how bad this series was on Will Pfeifer. I normally blame the writer when I read a comic I don’t like. I don’t feel that I can do that in this particular case. Since this is one of those Major Comic Book Events™, its not like Pfeifer had many choices in how this thing ends. That is the main problem I had with this book. The ending.

I didn’t understand it.

The book ends with the Goddess Athena on Mount Olympus (?) with many of the Greek gods (??) chained up behind her while she stares down into a basin of water and speaks about justice. One of the Greek goddesses (???) starts to give Athena grief over her use of the word “justice”. The unnamed Greek goddess points out that she stole Athena’s identity and left her for dead. What? This isn’t Athena? Well then who is this mystery woman? The fake Athena’s face begins to melt away and I have to turn the page to see what happens next.

The first thing I see upon turning the page is Clark Kent with a 6-foot long golden necktie wrapped around his neck with one end of the necktie being held by a cyborg Sinestro Corp Superman. Clark Kent’s shirt is torn open exposing his Superman costume underneath. Worse, he’s not wearing his glasses. Without his glasses, people will know that Clark Kent is Superman! The cyborg Sinestro Corp Superman is wearing Clark Kent’s glasses. I then realize that this isn’t part of the Amazons Attack story. No, this is just an extremely poorly placed advertisement for yet another DC Comics mini-series that promises to be just as retarded as this one.

The continuation of the story is on the next page. Talk about destroying the pacing of the story. Its a one-page splash showing someone who I assume is Bea Arthur all decked out in armor and laughing her fat ass off. Whats Bea Arthur doing in Amazons Attack? Thats it. The End.

I didn’t actually think this was in fact the actress Bea Arthur. Who then was it? After some searching on the Internets, I found out that it was someone called Granny Goodness. Who is that? What a ridiculous name. I’ve never heard of this character. I went to Wikipedia and did some research on Granny Goodness. It turns out she is a character created by Jack Kirby in 1971. She is part of Kirby’s New Gods series. How am I supposed to know that? I don’t mind having to do some post-comic book reading online research after reading a comic book. I really don’t. I cannot count how many times I’ve had to go to Wikipedia and look up something I wasn’t familiar with (father box). I just don’t know how I am supposed to know that a woman that looks like an actress from Golden Girls is a character created by Jack Kirby. In 1971. How about at least showing her name? It would make the required Wikipedia search so much easier.

And to think some people wonder why kids today shun comic books yet devour manga. You don’t have to know obscure manga trivia from over 30 years ago to read manga.