I wish ‘The Walking Dead’ was more like ‘The Love Boat’

I wish 'The Walking Dead' was more like 'The Love Boat'
Last night’s episode of The Walking Dead, the fourth season finale, was great. This has probably been the best season yet, especially the second half.

Most of the gang, everyone except Carol, Judith, Tyreese, was reunited at Terminus, albeit locked in a boxcar by a bunch of candle-loving cannibals.

Speaking of which, I learned an important lesson in last night’s episode: when older, long-haired Tasha Yar offers you a plate of barbecue, just say no. Tell her you already ate. Tell her you’re not hungry. Tell her anything, just don’t eat anything she’s serving up.

If you do, you may decide later to become a vegan.

As great as the episode was, it seems almost criminal to make viewers wait seven months for season five. That’s too long to wait. Season five isn’t supposed to kick off until October.

Back in the day, a series on TV ended in May and then began again the following September. When you watched the season finale of The Love Boat, it was assured you were going to see Gopher, Captain Stubing, Issac, and the rest of the Pacific Princess crew again in four short months. Not once did you have to wait seven months for The Love Boat to start again.

Why can’t The Walking Dead by more like The Love Boat?

Arizona students riot after loss in NCAA Tournament

Arizona students riot after loss in NCAA Tournament
The Arizona Wildcats lost 64-63 in overtime last night to the Wisconsin Badgers in the NCAA Basketball Tournament. The one people seem to care so passionately about, the men’s tournament, not the women’s.

The Badgers are now going to the Final Four, the Wildcats aren’t. Students, or young people pretending to be students, gathered outside drinking establishments near campus and proceeded to assemble in an unlawful manner. At least that is the charges at least 14 of the students were charged with when they were arrested. Greeting the unlawfully assembled students were lots and lots of members of the Tucson Police Department. As fate would have it, the cops were all decked out in riot gear.

Imagine that.

As soon as the game was over, the air quickly filled with the odor of teargas, beer, and overprivileged entitlement. In other words, it smelled like a typical Saturday night in Tucson.

It did provide a good backdrop for a Saturday night riot selfie, as the two students in the above photo are demonstrating. Their parents must be so proud.

Ray Rice marries the woman he knocked out

Ray Rice marries the woman he knocked out
Baltimore Ravens runningback Ray Rice, a day after being indicted by a grand jury on charges of third-degree aggravated assault, married his long-time girlfriend Janay Palmer. It was Palmer that Rice allegedly assaulted last month at an Atlantic City hotel, punching her into an unconscious state. According to sources of ESPN, the wedding had been planed for a couple of weeks.

The timing of the nuptials seems kind of… strange. Rice and Palmer have been together for a while. The two met in high school and planned on getting married this coming June. The two already have a child. Rice gets indicted on felony assault charges, that if convicted, could send him to prison for up to five years. The very next day, he marries the woman he assaulted. Allegedly.

Now that Palmer is legally Rice’s wife, she cannot be forced into testifying against him. Not that the prosecutor really needs Palmer to testify. According to TMZ Sports, Atlantic City cops have the actual assault on video from a hotel security camera. Part of the video has already been posted on the Internets. It shows an unconscious Palmer being carried out of an elevator by Rice.

Last year Rice rushed 3.1 yards a carry, for a pathetic 660 yards. He’s scheduled to make $4 million this season. That is if he’s not spending the season in a New Jersey big boy prison.

Redneck road rage instant karma?

A Florida woman was driving slow in the left lane when a man in a pickup truck came up behind her and began following her vehicle very closely. The woman, instead of moving to the right lane to allow the man to pass her, grabbed her smart phone and began videoing the incident. She was able to capture what she referred to as redneck roadrage instant karma.

Here’s the resulting video, in all its glory:

The guy in the truck was being an ass, but I don’t know if he would have reacted the way he did if he didn’t see that she was videoing him. Most people, even rednecks in pickups, don’t appreciate it when other people video them. Just ask Alec Baldwin.

Here’s what the woman posted on YouTube about the incident:

This happened to me on SR 41 in Tampa on Monday March 24th. This pathetic excuse for a human being tailgated me for about three minutes. After about a minute, and me shaking my head, I pulled out my phone and started recording. I couldn’t move over because there were trucks in the right lane, and I sure as heck wasn’t going to speed on a rainy day with the roads being as slick as they were.

Yes. The road was so slippery, so dangerous, that she couldn’t change lanes to get out of the passing lane, but she could grab her phone and begin recording video of what is going on behind her.

She continued:

In the full video which I will post later, you will be able to see that not once was I mouthing off, I never brake checked him, and in fact until I watched the video after the accident I didn’t even know he shot a bird at me because I wasn’t looking at him at all, I was paying attention to the road while holding the phone up with my right hand. I’ve recorded circumstances like this before, catching idiots doing stupid things, but never ever had this happen.

So she’s recorded circumstance like this before? I wonder then if she was trying to provoke this idiot into doing something stupid so that she could get instant YouTube fame. This is the only video she’s ever posted, and it already has over 3 million views.

You know what I hate more than people who drive slow in the left lane and wont move over to allow faster vehicles to pass? People who shoot phone video in portrait mode. This people should be sent to North Korea and made to get a Kim Jong Un haircut.

Los Angeles Dodgers have the highest payroll in baseball

Move over Yankees, the Dodgers have the highest payroll in baseball
For 15 years, the New York Yankees have had the highest payroll in Major League Baseball. Their reign has come in an end. The Los Angeles Dodgers projected payroll for 2014 is expected to be $235 million. The Yankees are expected to be the second highest with $204 million.

The Houston Astros have the lowest payroll at $45 million. This is actually a big improvement compared to last years payroll of $27 million. The Miami Marlins are second-to-last at $48 million.

It feels strange to live in a world where the Yankees don’t have the highest payroll. The last time this happened, Titanic won the Oscar for Best Picture and Bill Clinton was president.

One of the reasons that Yankees payroll is only $204 million this season is because they don’t have to pay suspended third baseman Alex Rodriguez his full $25 million salary this season. Even though he wont play at all this year, he’ll still make $3.8 this season.

The highest paid member of the Dodgers is pitcher Zack Greinke. He’s expected to make $26 million this season. That’s a lot of money, especially for someone who doesn’t play every day. Greinke is a pitcher, but he’s not even the team’s best pitcher.

Baseball is different in that players on the same team can make vastly different amounts of money. The best player on a team doesn’t necessarily make the most money. For instance, look at the Anaheim Angels of California Los Angeles 90210, or whatever their calling themselves this year. Center fielder Mike Trout is far and away their best player, yet he will be making only $1 million this season, and that’s after he got a raise. Last season Trout made $510,000. In comparison, the Angels will be paying Albert Pujols $23 million this season. I can’t imagine what it would be like to work someplace where I was the best worker in my department and someone else who was not the best worker in my department, made twenty-three times more than me.

How is Trout not angry and bitter?

I think that would be one of the hardest parts with being a professional athlete: everyone knows exactly how much you make and it’s rarely, if ever, very equitable. It’s usually too much or not enough, but usually it’s not just right.