Manti Te’o not drafted in the first round

The first round of the 2013 NFL draft took place last night, and Notre Dame linebacker All-American, Heisman Trophy runner-up Manti Te’o didn’t hear his name called. Thirty two teams picked players last night and he wasn’t one of them.

If Manti Te’o’s (fake) dead girlfriend were real, she’d probably be really sad right now.

Though having a fake girlfriend battling cancer undoubtedly helped him garner Heisman Trophy sympathy votes, it didn’t do much in the first round of the NFL draft. Then again, he only ran a 4.82-second 40-yard dash at the NFL combine and he looked pretty inept and over-matched in the national championship game against Alabama. Roll Tide!

Let this be a lesson to colligate student-athletes everywhere. If you’re going to pretend to have a dead girlfriend to score sympathy with gullible members of the sports media, make sure you’re actually at least half-way decent at the sport in which you play. Before the national championship game and the NFL combine, Manti Te’o was expected to be a top-five pick.

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